I must be e-mo!

Many of you know that I recently went through a breakup. This is the second serious relationship I've had in my life (and I'm only 18) which has ended. It ended because there were problems, of course - issues that would not go away, no matter how many times we uttered "I promise" or "I'll change." But he was a great guy. We also had a lot of happy times together.

So we ended on a bittersweet note, of grieving a lost love, yet still remaining on somewhat good terms with each other.

At first, I was devastated. I thought he really was the perfect guy for me. Moving out, marriage, kids, the works. Suddenly, the future was a dark stranger.

I am not the most emotionally stable person at the best of times. I was scared for myself, as well.

But then it was all crystal clear. I had two options.

1) Be emo. Cry about it forever, lamenting "Why, WHY?!" Be in permanent funeral mode. Decide that there is no one else, no one will ever love me again, and spend the rest of my life suspended in self pity. Write thousands of acoustic guitar songs and poetry about broken hearts. Friends get sick of me sobbing into bottles of vodka and constantly bursting into tears. I serial date millions of silly men because I have so little self esteem. I end up alone - really alone - in a state of aching psychosis. My life becomes education, steady career, death.

2) Realise that it's all for the best. If it was meant to be, it was meant to be. But it wasn't, and there's nothing anybody can do about it. Yes, be sad about it for a while. It's okay to be sad. But remember that it's okay to laugh as well, and do things that make me happy. I use the opportunity to spend more time with my friends, so we can both make each other happy. I am not looking, but I am confident that one day I will find Captain Perfect. Let's face it, I am dorky, and a bit odd, but I'm not entirely hateable. I will learn from all my mistakes from my past relationships and make him the happiest man on the planet. In a non-baking-cookies-and-giving-blowjobs sort of way.

I didn't think I would, but I ended up going down the path of #2 (sans Captain Perfect). I don't know whether it's because I've been through it all before or what, but I decided that rational thinking was the way to go. It keeps your sanity in check. And just because something bad has happened doesn't mean you're not allowed to be happy. I guess you can apply that to anything. Things might seem bad now, but eventually you'll look back on it and merely see it as a memory.

So, pro tip for the dumped or the sad: don't be emo, be happy!



NOTE: This entry is not intended to take a shot at anyone, especially not my ex - I am only reflecting upon my own feelings. Also, apologies for the serious nature of this post. I just really needed to get it off my chest. I promise more humour in the future!